BEST FRIEND

I used to think that she loved me a lot. It was just that I had to propose.Even I used to love her too. Loved her a lot.
I loved it when She used to call me her BEST FRIEND, when She used to speak her heart out to me, when She used to tell everything that was on her mind to me, when She used to have those fights and the way she used to quarrel with me, when she used to chat with me, when she used to listen to my poems and then praise them, when she used to adore me, when she used to love me.

But I didnt know that she used to consider me as a BEST FRIEND only.


I felt a stab in the heart and enormous pain when she told me one day, "I have fallen in love with him......". But just as she expected, I made fun of her, laughed, joked, and brought
out that smile on her face. She was waiting for someone to listen to her. She didnt know what to say and what not to say. She was excited, she was happy, very happy. I had seldom seen her so happy.
I said," Good good, One girl seems to be very happy eh!
"She said,"Dont worry, you too will get someone pretty !".
My mind was crying yet my lips were smiling. I was trying really hard not to let her know my actual feelings. And I succeded, she didnt understand. She was in love and she couldnt see anything else.

I decided to keep my thoughts to myself and not to tell her.
Because she she used to consider me as a BEST FRIEND only.

She went and heart went numb. My mind was in deep thoughts, a whole lot of confusion. I started remembering all those days I had spent with her. I started to erase them from my mind, I tried really hard.
Whenever we met again, I used to tease her a lot. Whenever she had a fight or was in pain, or had her mind at unrest, she used to turn towards me. She used to look out for me. She needed me. She used to say "I want to meet you. I want to tell you so many things."But she never used to say when, what time , what place.

I never showed her the tears in my mind, in my eyes.
Because she used to consider me as a BEST FRIEND only.


I used to sulk, I used to cry. I used be lost within my loneliness. Whenever she used to talk to me, my eyes used to keep swallowing the tears. It was tough to act, it was tough to hide everything from her, Because she knew me very well. My heart was still with hers. My mind was still with hers.
She used to have fights with him and then she used to come to me and tell
me about them. I used to listen to her patiently and then say things that would make her feel better. And then she used to say. "Thank you. Now i feel better."

She felt that my presence was more important than my words though,
Because she used to consider me as a BEST FRIEND only.


Sometimes, she used to be this wild thing. She used to take anyones name and start teasing me with it. I used to fake the anger and act mad on her and make her smile by doing
so. I never let her know my pain and my sadness. Not a word did I speak, not a
word did i say.
She introduced me one day to him and my healings wounds once again opened up. She introduced me as a very good friend and showed him the book of poems i had gifted her once.Next day, he gifted her a poem written by him. Was he feeling insecure about her.

He didnt need to feel any such insecurity.
Because she used to consider me as a BEST FRIEND only.



She invited me for her wedding. On the card it was written ,"You must come. You must be there".My heart was shattered to a thousand pieces and i had no one else but me to gather them. I brought her a present, something which she liked. Made sure she was happy and I faked happiness outside.

I did all this and will do all this Because she used to consider me as a BEST FRIEND only.


After she got married, I made a promise."Will avoid meeting her and will keep a distance".I didnt want her to know how I feel, or how I have changed, Coz She was in love and she was not interested in knowing it.

I did all this and will do all this Because she used to consider me as a BEST FRIEND.


Years passed. She was busy with her family life and I had an excuse of my "busy life". I lived alone all my life. When she used to write letters, I started replying to them in one or two lines.

But even to those one or two lines, She kept on replying.
Because she used to consider me as a BEST FRIEND.


In her last days, I met her. She was dying. She was unable to speak much. She was crying. But still she said one sentence, " You showed true friendship till my very end."
I was crying. I couldnt wait more.

She said what she had to say.Because she used to consider me as a BEST FRIEND.


Now even my journey is coming to an end. Just a few more days to go i feel. A postman appeared at the gate one day and gave a parcel. A parcel for me, i wondered. I questioned.Was it something she left behind in her will for me?

Maybe yes, after all ,she used to consider me as a BEST FRIEND.


I opened it and it was a diary. Her diary. In that I found my lost time, my lost memories, my naughty tricks, my pranks, my laughter, my talks, my jokes, my tears, my secrets, my
meetings , my days , my friendship , my life.

And i felt, "Yes indeed, she used to consider me as a BEST FRIEND."


When I reached the last few pages of the diary, The tears that I had stopped in my eyes for so many years rolled out.

"I used to think he loves me very much and he was just waiting to propose to
me. Even i love him a lot. When I call him my BEST FRIEND, he smiles. He tells his secrets to me. He listens to me. He fights with me. He reads his poems to me and then looks at me. I can see the gleam in his eyes. His eyes cant hide.

I know he loves me.
I think he loves me.
Does he really love me?"

I felt I was reading my lines, my mind in her diary. I felt I was dead, even before I could die.
Why did Destiny play such a cruel game with me?
Why did it let me know all this when my life is now ending?

Was it that Destiny wanted me to know the truth.

Was it that Destiny wanted me to know that she used to consider me as her TRUE LOVE .